one word reviews of Movies and TV

Friday, March 25, 2016

Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice

Spoiler Free Review
Batman V Superman
Dawn of Justice:
Bloated 
 2h 33mins | Action | 2016

So how is Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice?

It's
Good. Not great...but good.



That's it in a nutshell. The movie is fun, dark and gritty. Everyone's sure to be favorite is Batman. Big reason I went to see it plus well... Wonder Woman. Been dying to see Wonder Woman in a movie. But Batman...he is simply amazing.

The film as a whole is riddled with problems. The truth is the movie itself is its own worse enemy.

Let's start with the good.

Ben Affleck kills it as both Bruce Wayne and Batman. First actor that filled both those shoes since Keaton. Keaton as Bruce Wayne really? Yes he was the closest. When Batman Begins hit I thought Bale did the deuces, but as his mantel of Batman continued his voice became worse. Keaton in two films held the two better then anyone else since. Well until Affleck stole it from under his cape. Affleck steals the film. Just takes the film and runs with it. The voice is awesome. The cave is great and the Batmobile, ugh I want more. Alfred was great as well. He has a few moments that will make you grin. I simply cannot rest till I see a standalone film with those two again, I just cannot. I hope Affleck does a few Batman movies and continues this with what he has created. Oh when they do, please use one villain, stop the cramming of a few into one movie.  

Lex Luther, a lot of people will hate this version but I liked it. It's different but simple. Lex is just crazy. He is ruthless, smart and pretty much a mad scientist. Dare I say at the end I liked it? True is half way into the film I hated Eisenberg's performance. But as the mad scientist it grew on me and at the end I was intrigued to see where it will go in the future.

Visually the movie looks great. Its dark and I liked it. All the suits look amazing. Superman, Wonder
Woman and Batman look great. The costumes are just on point. I cannot talk more on how amazing they are.

Wonder Woman was kickass. I liked her a lot and I only wish there was more. I got excited when they call out Diana Prince's name. Her as WW that costume looks great and when she popped up she received such a large cheer at the theater. Gal Gadot is Wonder Woman and I will be there on opening day when her film drops.

Listen Batman and Wonder Woman are the the best part of this bloated film. Everything else kinda makes you wonder why. But damn it was entertaining to watch this on the big screen.


What about the Bad stuff?

The film is 10 years too late. If this came out before The Avengers I think things would work out better. Like I said the movie is its own worst enemy. The idea of this film being the beginning of this larger world and following up with having a Justice League film is the biggest issue I have here. Because this isn't one movie.

"This is 4 movies crammed into a 2hr and 33 min film. That just didn't need to be"

Superman was under used and weak. This could of been better on the writers end. Then again I don't care much for Superman anyway, but come on guys. There is so much to do with him yet they seemed to not want to do the leg work.

Should Superman exist is a great idea for a movie, maybe a Superman standalone one but we didn't need to be here yet with this film. Why? Because they first should of created a single Batman movie. The two could create a build up to a real Batman V Superman. Here there isn't much of a buildup. Mostly you see and feel it from Bruce but I wish we had a scene were you see him at the funeral for everyone at Wayne Enterprises or something really painful. Yes you do get hints but it doesn't feel enough for me. That beginning was great but we needed more. You understand he takes this personal and he wants this not to happen again but it should of been more of a build up. You should see that anger build which we get but there should of been more. The movie just had no more room for it. Yet its a 2 and a half film. That shouldn't be. The movie just had no idea where to go with itself.


It should of only been Batman and Superman. Each gets to bring 1 person. That is. But when you add the Dawn of Justice, things begin to go a different way. This doesn't become a film about Batman vs Superman, it becomes a film about coming together which isn't what we as the viewer were sold on.

I only wanted to see each other kick each others asses. We get that but its small. Next film should of been the building of the team. I didn't want to hear about all these other characters now, I didn't want to hear about anything but two guys who hate each other. But that is the issue.

Too much in one film.

What you end up getting is this back and forth.

Batman is great but then you switch to Diana Prince and your like shit I want to see her in her own film. Then it's back to Clark, then Batman damn Batman is cool I can't wait to see-then boom! Cut to Superman then back to Woman Woman then to Bruce then to Lex.

"Ugh I just want to see Batman that is all and damn I can't wait to see a Wonder Woman movie". This was my thought process, over and over again. We should of gotten that before hand.



This film is bloated. It has way too many comic book stories jammed in. Way too many characters.

Just way too much in a already too long of a film.

Oh and yeah Doomsday. You saw the trailer. Well there is more but its pretty much the same Doomsday. He changes a bit and gives Superman a run for his money. This whole part felt like it could of been better. Saw a lot of great opportunities but it didn't go as far as it could.

There is this one great shot of Superman in space that looks great, but that's all I can say without giving anything away.

Other then that it was fun to watch but


Wednesday, March 23, 2016

Attention!

Stop the Spoilers




Dear Reviewers & Youtubers,

With the release of Star Wars: The Force Awakens and Batman v Superman, we here at Simplistic Reviews have notice a very big problem. A problem so big that it only leads us to saying...

Most of you are stupid, egotistic, I need to get viewer/reader assholes.

Seriously it needs to stop with the spoilers.

Stop posting reviews with spoilers.

Stop tweeting spoilers.

Stop with the Youtube videos were all you do is spoil everything for everyone.

In regards to Batman v Superman:

A movie that doesn’t come out for 2 more days but seen by a lucky bunch 3 days ago, is already spoiled by them.

Wait 1 week from the opening date. Thats it. Just wait 1 week before spoiling anything.

It is not far to those who do not get the lucky privilege of seeing a film a whole 5 days before it comes out. Take us for an example. We are waiting for the earlier 1 day screening. Already we have had things thrown at us and it hasn't even come out. We simply can not go on any form of online media because of this douchebaggery. We can’t even go on Instagram do to the need to spoil right away in the mofo comments.  

Wait 1 goddamn week! 

or GFYS


Sincerely,

Planet Earth



Tuesday, March 22, 2016

The Simplistic Reviews Podcast (Ep. 66) March 2016

FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY


On this ORDER 66 Episode of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast, the boys get prepped for Batman V Superman with a brand new skit.  Matt accepts our award from GeekCast Radio Network for best podcast. And to prove that they can be fair, the boys play a round of Simply Say Anything.  Trailers, Indiana Jones, and Daredevil talk.  All this and more on the March edition of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast.


Notes
Order 66
Sean Connery Slapping Women Explanation
Judge Reinhold
Predator Poster
James Franco Batman Cowl

Music
In Your Eyes By Peter Gabriel


Check us out on FacebookTwitterYouTubeLetterboxd, and Pinterest

Thursday, March 17, 2016

Trailer Hot Take: X-Men: Apocalypse (Final Trailer)

We've been getting some pretty nice trailers in the run-up to the Summer Movie Season, but I guess trailers are all you get when there is a glut of ho-hum films, so it's easy to get excited.

This time on "Trailer Hot Take" we take a look at the latest, and what seems to be the final, "X-Men: Apocalypse" trailer. It's a mixed bag of goodies and for me personally, my verdict is still out on this one.

I have to admit, I'm digging this 80s style. I mean, look at that purple V with the sports coat!

Oscar Issac on the slab, pre-Apocalypse. I'm interested to see how they weave this origin story.

So is the suit going to be something created through "magic" or an actual tangible suit, or of "celestial" origin.

The new and improved Magneto helmet

And the new and improved Magneto suit.

Who could this be in the scene with Quicksilver? Magda....Magneto's wife?

Is the RUSH shirt a little too on the nose?

Pre-Archangel fighting Nightcrawler in Hell in a Cell.

It looks like William Stryker is back, but in what capacity.

I may not be an Oliva Munn fan, but at least they got the Psylocke costume and sword right.

Havok going crazy in Cerebro...but why?

I hope the X-Mansion was covered for Apocalypse Insurance.

With a ton of J-Law shots in this trailer, will she meet her end at the hands of our titular villain?

Well, that's it for this Trailer Hot Take. kthnxbye.

Batman V Superman: Special Simplistic Reviews Op-ed Edition (4-5)

Batman V Superman:
Special Simplistic Reviews
Op-ed Edition

Part Four:
Lex Luther



The follow contains both official information and photos. Some fan made photos and my thoughts on the rumors.

Do you remember where you were when on the day... You heard Jesse Eisenberg was cast as Lex Luthor?


I could never forget that day. The ground rumble from the cries of fans and non-fans of the character from all around the world. Those rumbles still tremble to this day. I myself was taken back, not with hate but surprise. Never in my mind did I ever think to cast Eisenberg as Lex Luthor. He seems so small and under built, I say this by the way because I imagine Lex straight from Superman the Animated series. To me this is my favorite version of the character for both Superman and Lex. 

Sure, it looked great on TV but Lex is known for his smarts, his intellect is at a genius level. Using his skills in engineering he creates war suits and weapons that stand up to the god known as Superman. Luthor in the flesh doesn't need to be tall, strong or speak with a deep voice, he just needs to come off like like the evil genius he is.

With Jesse Eisenberg you get that both in his voice and the visual expression he creates. But again what about looks? This is a movie after all. I couldn't see it, Eisenberg? No! No Way

... Well the studio did want Tom Hanks to portray Lex Luthor. :|

Then the internet happened. And listen sometimes there are these moments the internet makes me proud, sometimes it works for the good of mankind.

So what do I mean by this? Ladies and Gentlemen of Movie's and TV. I come here today to make my case. Jesse Eisenberg will be the best Lex Luthor to ever grace our eyes. Yes you heard me, Eisenberg will be amazing and if the following is anywhere near true to life then we're in for one fun ride. 

So I present exhibit A


Yes that's right, you thought this was from a comic, and no it is not. That is the internet showing just how great this could be.
But what about the other side. The side about the script, which could make or break everything?
Lets play devil's advocate and present a bit of news that could make things go south. Recently it has come out that the script was not fully a-o-k-a-y with a certain cast member... 

Ladies and Gentleman, exhibit B!




"Ben Affleck 'Wasn’t Thrilled' With the 'Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice' Script — and Rewrote It Dressed As the Superhero!"




Yes Affleck himself was not happy with the script and decided to rewrite it dressed as mofo Batman. This is the one news that made we shake in my boots. David S. Goyer apparently wrote the story and when Affleck came on board he brought along Chris Terrio. Goyer has his issues and that is what has me worried. Goyers writing with Esienberg's delivery is what I'm most afraid about. I think we will get a great Lex Luthor, one we haven't seen before. With all the trailers, TV spots and photos Batman V Superman is gearing up to be a fun watch. Movies have lost some fun lately, Star Wars and Deadpool has brought us back to the theater. Batman V Superman and Captain America Civil War is doing the same.

Damn 2016 is becoming a hell of a year in movies. 

Next up...
Part 5 - Batman V Superman: The Review.












Thursday, March 10, 2016

Trailer Hot Take: Captain America: Civil War (Final Trailer)

Matt again, with another Trailer Hot Take. I mean, in all honesty, we all know that "Captain America" Civil War" is going to be awesome. It's going to be everything that "Age of Ultron" wasn't. The expectations almost seem impossibly high this time, and while "Ultron" was just an appetizer, this is going to be the entree that all MCU fans have been waiting for. Let's go to the pictures:

This is shortly after an explosion in the trailer in some sort of UN-style conference, and from the looks of it, this looks like T'Challa, aka, Black Panther, Prince of Wakanda was present.

Fancy underwater base? Check!
Cap is chasing T'Challa who is chasing Bucky. The CG is a little weak right now, but I'm sure they'll fix this up before May

It's always been said that Scarlet Witch is one of the most powerful MUTANTS, yes, I said mutants, not Miracles (screw that) and what she's doing to Vision right here is downright dirty

Hawkeye lets loose a barrage of arrows, and look who's riding one of the, our good friend Scott Lang!

It's so awesome to see Crossbones in the MCU finally. Just a bad-ass character


AND HERE IS THE MONEY SHOT

 Hey everyone......

"Captain America: Civil War" swings into theaters May 5th

Friday, March 4, 2016

3 Simplistic Things: February 2016

Matt here again with 3 Simplistic Things that I'm sure you heard happened in February, but I"m going to tell you anyway.

 1. Launch of Viceland

This is something that I'm sure a lot of people missed, because honestly, if you could find me three people that watched H2 (History Channel's sister station) I would call you a liar. VICE, on the other hand, is pretty much a household name, thanks to HBO's weekly news show. Now, H2 is a distant memory and enter, Viceland. Full of original, compelling content, including weekly shows featuring rapper Action Bronson, LGBT crusader, Ellen Page, and much more, Viceland is TV at it's finest.

2. The Return of Broad City

Abbi and Illana are back for more New York adventures as season three of Broad City returned to Wednesday nights on Comedy Central. While I can honestly say the season premier was a little bit of a letdown from the series premier and the season two premier, episode two was a vast improvement. I guess my issue with this season so far as been that two of the three highest rated episodes of the season have been this season. Has no one seen "Pussy Weed" or "Kirk Steele" or "Hashtag FOMO?" Oh well, maybe I'm just cranky....

3. I guess we won the Deadpool

Who'd of thought that an R-Rated Comic Book flick is, and quite possibility could be one of the highest grossing films of the year? I didn't that see that one coming from "Deadpool." What can be said about "Deadpool" is that they got it right. Fox had a property that they chose to take a gamble with, and let it become an organic thing in-and-of-itself, and it's paying off....and paying, and paying, and paying.

That's it for this month, kthnxbye!

Thursday, March 3, 2016

Trailer Hot Take: Ghostbusters (2016)

It seems the Internet has been in a tizzy today after the release of the first of what will likely be quite a few trailers for the new"Ghostbusters" film. While some of the reaction has been positive, there are still quite a few people out there up in arms that their beloved quartet of proton pack-wielding demigod killers have been replaced with what could be a new beloved quartet of proton pack-wielding demigod killers.

While my initial reaction was somewhat positive, in case you don't listen to our podcast you know the three of us have been pretty gun-shy to say this film will be any good, and yes, after immediately seeing the trailer some of my worries for squashed, but upon another few viewings, a few things starting sticking out to me to really did give me this "meh" feeling.


Here are a few things to consider:

I like seeing the old firehouse from the original films, it's a nice piece of homage.


Now this is when things not so great.....I hoping there will be some work done on the CG, because this really isn't cutting it....

More weird ghost CG.....

 I do like Kate McKinnon, a lot. I would assume she is playing the role of an Egon Spangler-type this time, but she looks like she might be stealing the show in this one.

This iteration of Ecto-1 (if that's what they are going to call it) looks pretty good and I like it swerving past the arc near Washington Square Park


 The uniforms look pretty good, no real complaints here


 Again, more suspect CG....and......3D might be looming....oh boy.....

I guess this is supposed to be funny and/or sexual based on what McKinnon's character is supposed to be developed into. We'll see.....


 The proton pack beams do look pretty legit

My main gripe is the overall tone of the trailer, as it kind of gives you a little bit of the new with some weird new tones. I hope the "possession" angle of the film isn't a major plot point and just happens to be a small scene. But we'll see in July....

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