one word reviews of Movies and TV

Friday, December 28, 2018

A Simplistic Review: Deadpool 2


I feel the short-hand "DP2" was so on the nose for "Deadpool 2" that perhaps in fact I was DP'd. Not that I would know that DP'ing is. Because I'm the good, God-fearing member of The Simplistic Reviews Podcast. Not like my heathens-in-crime of course. But man, the EXCESS in "Deadpool 2" is well, sometimes, a little bit EXCESSive

If you love Wade Wilson and his constant wink-wink, nod-nods to the camera, the audience and his fellow characters, you are going to love "DP2" and all it's DP'ingness.

From a comic reader perspective it's awesome because you finally see Cable on the big screen, along with Domino, and by the way, Zazie Beetz is a kween. And shoot, you even get Shatterstar and they reference Mojo World. Talk about a deep cut!

You get Goonies references, more baby appendages, shoot I even forgot, you get to see Black Tom Cassidy! Maybe there isn't enough in this film, I actually want more. What have I become...

Thursday, December 27, 2018

A Simplistic Review: Spider-Man: Into the Spider-verse

I was cautious about this film. In hindsight, I wonder why I ever was. It's so darn good, it's almost frustrating.

At the end of the day, I'm a purist when it comes to comic books and how I like the look and feel of them. If I had it my way I would have characters look exactly how they looked in all the comics I read in the 90s. Imagine how everyone would look in "X-Men: First Class" or even in that Ultron flick? Probably a little problematic actually...

But there is serious SERVICE paid in "Spider-Man: Enter the Spider-verse." You have what people have been clamoring for for years. Finally a film with Miles Morales AND Spider-Gwen. What kind of world do we live in? A pretty special one indeed. Considering we are living in an even more inclusive society, this is the perfect film, at the perfect time. It's almost needed. It's a film that should inspire and make evident, what's already been said over and over; "Anyone can be Spider-(wo)man."

Monday, December 24, 2018

A Simplistic Review: The Favourite (2018)

Since 2015's "The Lobster" Yorgos Lanthimos has established himself, at least to me, as a modern day Aesop, creating adult-themed FABLES that are both mind-bending, funny, and unlike anything any other director is creating right now.

"The Favourite" is a film that takes the tried and true concept of the "costume drama" and turns it into a PG-13 version of "Salo" with two of the best in the business with Rachel Weisz and Emma Stone turning in some great performances where it leaves you guessing who is the hero or the villain.

Throw in Nicholas Hoult with his over the top David Bowie-like performance and Olivia Colman putting in some serious work as Queen Anne and you have some great fun right here.

Friday, December 21, 2018

(Ep. 114): The Simplistic Reviews Podcast: December 2018

Happy Holidays to all, and to all a good podcast! The Simplistic Reviews Podcast is back to jingle some bells and deck some halls with Simon Appleton from Moustache Movie News. We ask the expert in all things U.K. everything from Brexit, the metric system, and Meghan Markel...we also take a break to read some Christmas cards sent to Santa, much to the chagrin of our Jewish cohost Matthew Stewart. We also bring back one of our favorite games, Simplistic Titles, to see if Simon knows what movies are real and which ones come from the dark recesses of DJ Valentine's twisted mind. All that reindeer crap and more on a fa-la-la-la-loaded episode of the Simplistic Reviews Podcast


MUSIC
Deck The Halls By Album House
Hark The Herald Angels Sing By Album House
Jingle Bells By Album House
O Little Town Of Bethlehem By Album House
We Wish You An Indie Christmas By Aaron Tosti
Happy Christmas Deck The Halls By Be Still The Earth
8-Bit Blues By Fairlight
Move By OBOY


NOTES
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Audition
Aladdin First Look
Lindsey Lohan Beach Club

Tuesday, December 18, 2018

A Simplistic Review: The Meg (2018)

Big, stupid films are so hard to gauge. People still like to throw around that whole "guilty pleasure" argument but honestly, you should like what you like and there shouldn't be guilt involved, but man..."The Meg" was the perfect BAIT in 2018 for anyone who was in the market for a big, dumb film about sharks that get bigger and bigger and if you wanted to see Rainn Wilson play a bigger jerk than his alter ego in "The Office."

No, "The Meg" isn't Asylum cheesy, but I would have loved to have seen the studio meeting which I sure included "hey, 'Sharknado' is still a thing right, people still love giant fish!" The sad fact is that "Sharknado" works because it's just one of those films that has all the ironic detachment it needs to be endearing, "The Meg" is a bit of a slog with just enough Jason Statham to make it somewhat tolerable and entertaining.

It just seems like a missed opportunity that the "Baby Shark" song wasn't used in some form. It's a travesty.

Wednesday, December 12, 2018

A Simplistic Review: Gremlins


"Gremlins" is a lot of fun. It's pure insanity and another reason for the advent of the PG-13 rating. I mean there are people getting murdered, gooey explosions and probably one of the best reasons for a person to hate Christmas in cinematic history.

But the one thing that will always be a point of contention is the LOGIC of taking care of and dealing with an actual Mogwai. You mean this thing can't drink water. It can't take in any of the suns rays, and when exactly does "after midnight" end? It's fun to debate these quirky little things about "Gremlins" and at least I can say it's a Christmas movie to get away with watching it at least once a year.

Sunday, December 9, 2018

A Simplistic Review: The Christmas Chronicles (2018)

Not one holiday has more films dedicated to it then Christmas. From "It's A Wonderful Life" to "Black Christmas" there is a Christmas film for everyone. So when a new Christmas flick comes around, it just seems like white noise, and while "The Christmas Chronicles" takes it's cues from films like "Elf" with a dash of "Adventures in Babysitting" and the cutesy CGI of "Trolls" there is something QUAINT about it.

He's played Elvis...three times, Wyatt Earp, and a cartoon dog, but seeing Kurt Russell ham it up as Santa Claus, is truly a lot of fun. Much like Tim Allen in "The Santa Clause" Russell is doing his best to put his stamp on the role of Jolly Old Saint Nick for a new generation, and it works.

Will this be a new Christmas classic? I certainly think you can put this in your holiday film rotation going forward and have a pretty good time. 

Tuesday, December 4, 2018

A Simplistic Review: The Big Lebowski


I guess this review felt slightly appropriate only because this is the only film that I can think of that features a clip of a speech from George H.W. Bush, but it also features the ICON that is The Dude in "The Big Lebowski."

Watching this film made me come up with the weird parallel that The Dude is Kuwait and his life has been invaded by Iraq who you could call either Jackie Treehorn of The Nihilists or even the real Jeffrey Lebowski. Weird, but think about it...

I remember reading a review by Rene Rodriguez from "The Miami Herald" who really bashed this film. It's always been a vivid memory of mine. But I consider this the very best that the Coen Brothers have done with the craziest cast of characters they've created. It's damn near perfect.

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